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Everyone in
the apartment complex I lived in knew who Ugly was. Ugly was
the resident tomcat. Ugly loved three things in this world:
fighting, eating garbage, and shall we say, love. The
combination of these things combined with a life spent
outside had their effect on Ugly.
To start with, he had only one eye, and where the other
should have been was a gaping hole. He was also missing his
ear on the same side, his left foot has appeared to have
been badly broken at one time, and had healed at an
unnatural angle, making him look like he was always turning
the corner.
His tail has long since been lost, leaving only the smallest
stub, which he would constantly jerk and twitch. Ugly would
have been a dark gray tabby striped-type, except for the
sores covering his head, neck, even his shoulders with
thick, yellowing scabs. Every time someone saw Ugly there
was the same reaction. "That's one ugly cat!"
All the children were warned not to touch him, the adults
threw rocks at him, hosed him down, squirted him when he
tried to come in their homes, or shut his paws in the door
when he would not leave. Ugly always had the same reaction.
If you turned the hose on him, he would stand there, getting
soaked until you gave up and quit. If you threw things at
him, he would curl his lanky body around feet in
forgiveness. Whenever he spied children, he would come
running meowing frantically and bump his head against their
hands, begging for their love. If you ever picked him up he
would immediately begin suckling on your shirt, earrings,
whatever he could find.
One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbors huskies.
They did not respond kindly, and Ugly was badly mauled. From
my apartment I could hear his screams, and I tried to rush
to his aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was
apparent Ugly's sad life was almost at an end.
Ugly lay in a wet circle, his back legs and lower back
twisted grossly out of shape, a gaping tear in the white
strip of fur that ran down his front. As I picked him up and
tried to carry him home I could hear him wheezing and
gasping, and could feel him struggling. I must be hurting
him terribly I thought. Then I felt a familiar tugging,
sucking sensation on my ear- Ugly, in so much pain,
suffering and obviously dying was trying to suckle my ear. I
pulled him closer to me, and he bumped the palm of my hand
with his head, then he turned his one golden eye towards me,
and I could hear the distinct sound of purring. Even in the
greatest pain, that ugly battled-scarred cat was asking only
for a little affection, perhaps some compassion.
At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving
creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or
scratch me, or even try to get away from me, or struggle in
any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely trusting in me
to relieve his pain.
Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat
and held him for a long time afterwards, thinking about how
one scarred, deformed little stray could so alter my opinion
about what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love
so totally and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and
compassion than a thousand books, lectures, or talk show
specials ever could, and for that I will always be thankful.
He had been scarred on the outside, but I was scarred on the
inside, and it was time for me to move on and learn to love
truly and deeply. To give my total to those I cared for.
Many people want to be richer, more successful, well liked,
beautiful, but for me, I will always try to be Ugly. |
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