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He came into my life unexpectedly. Sorta like a movie, you
know, the kind that leaves you with little tears about to
fall from your eyes. A huge lump in your throat, and
inspiration. A drive that makes you so sure you will find
love out there. (Wishful thinking?)
We met on the internet. I can already hear the peanut
gallery's snide remarks and deftly dealt blows to my
intelligence, my morals, my thoughts. After all, I must be
crazy, and he must be an axe murderer right? I must be
desperate, after all, to fall in love with a man over the
internet. No, none of the above. (You pessimists just have
to chalk this one up to a loss!) He is the most caring,
compassionate man I have ever met. And I can say that with
all honesty, with all truths freely tossed into the lion's
den for approval.
At first, I wasn't expecting it to happen. Wasn't looking
for it. But I wasn't against it. I was open to it
sub-consciously I suppose. Searching for that fairy tale
somewhere, my internal thoughts caught up with the rest of
science and dove into technology as well. I had heard so
much about it happening to real life people like me, from
places in the world I had never heard of, but it happened! I
had talked to him on and off through way of chat rooms for
about a year. In this year, I didn't get to know him really.
Except the fact that he seemed like a really nice guy. He
intrigued me. Maybe it was this portal into another realm we
were both opening up. Making it harder to not talk. It's all
you can do, just type out your inner most thoughts, and
delight in the very thought of making a 'friend' online.
We started talking, and I wanted to know more about him. I
got excited when I saw his name in my e-mail inbox. Even
happier I was when replying to him. I was pouring myself out
to this stranger, and he was responding. Giving of himself
more and more each time he hit Send, as was I.
In this chat room, we had 'mutual friends'. Other people
that regularly chatted and with whom shared a bond with us.
We knew each other's names, who had kids, each other's love
lives, or lack thereof, and who was allergic to what. A
kinship was born in this chat room, but all of that was
irrelevant as I asked this other chatter, "What's his phone
number?" I asked, he gave. I called him that night.
Our phone conversation was great. I was attracted
immediately by his voice. He was feeling the same way about
mine. But there had to be more, right? There just has to be!
I was thirsting for more information from him. I simply
wanted to know everything about this man. We had seen each
other's pictures already, sent through the wonderful e-mail
services. Our eyes glanced upon each other's pictures and
saw a promising something there. We liked each other at this
point. Promises to call each other were made, and more
e-mails were sent.
Finally, we fell in love. Just like that. Fell. Head over
heels. And I can say this, without hesitation, that I fall
in love with this man more and more every day. When I hear
his voice, BAM, I fall in love again. When I look into his
eyes, BAM, I'm in love again. Anything this man does equates
to pure, sweetened love for me. Of course, there's a loop
hole. Isn't there always? We are long distance. I represent
the East Coast, and he the West. Was it possible, is it
possible? Yes and yes. We talked endlessly about this. Tip
toed around the fact that it would be hard, but took into
the account that it wouldn't be easy. Pored over every
obstacle that would stand in our way, and would eventually
test us and our strength, had we gotten together.
We talked about our wants, our needs, our desires at this
time. What we wanted from each other, and how we could go
about it. We knew all we wanted was to be together, but
could we handle it? Were we ready to take on something so
rough? We have. Overcoming the distance, the money issues,
the conversation issues, well, it hasn't been easy. But we
don't think any relationship is a bed of roses. We take the
good, and the bad, and we still love each other.
Through this love we have grown stronger. We have learned
from each other. We have taken our relationship beyond the
levels of just something we got 'off the internet'.
Meeting was like a dream. I was absolutely on pins and
needles. Seeing him though, only reinstated my previous
feelings I had felt for him, and made them that much
stronger. Love at first sight? Oh, it happened alright. We
have shared so many times together. His presence completes
me. The lost piece to my puzzle. The one thing that I can
hold onto in this world. The one relationship I have ever
felt love from. He loves me. Plain and simple. With my flaws
and all. He sees the good in me, and I can see it in him. I
have found my true connection. Without him, I'd simply be
searching for something that couldn't give me what he gives
me. It would only be false, and I know this to be of truth,
because for once in my life, my heart feels what my head
does, and their both in sync. I'm loving every minute of it.
When you hear the proverbial warnings of finding anything
reliable on the internet, scoff away the remarks. It can
happen, it has happened. When you hear the woes of love
tales gone sour, just know that love is alive. It is all
around us, and it will find you when you least expect it.
And in the last place you would ever think of finding it. |
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